anguish and apples

It wasn't what I thought it was
when I looked in to your eyes
it wasn't 'till you broke up with me
that I began to realize
All the things you told me
about who we were together
just a limerick wove from heart strings
for your demented pleasure

It wasn't what I thought it was
playing with your hair
it was being with a woman
who wasn't really there
just a wasteland dream, mirage
created in the sorrow of my mind
a pretended grand adventure
born in anguish, lost in time

To this day I savor apples
slightly sour, green and round
they remind me of those months
you turned my insides upside down
The taste lingers on my tongue
like raindrops in a storm
reality a burning fire
that keeps me safe and warm

Where it is, that time takes me
I guess I'll never know
I hope it always takes me
far from where ever it is you go
It isn't that the sight of you
would bother me at all
I just wouldn't want to pleasure you
by reminding you of my fall